Monday, August 29, 2011

El Rey, Miss Catherine, and the disagreeable Affair at Pantalones Ajustado

Miss Catherine and El Rey stroll chaperoned by The Elf with No Name and Miss Dotti
"In the old days it was simple. Elves fought Orcs and an Elf knew which side he was on. Long before the usurper Mordred stole the Peacock throne and darkness descended on our Blessed Catalucia, I was but the Capitan of the Ciudad Pantalones Ajustado Militia by day. At night I sang in the cantina with my gaita band.

Once in a while the hated Orcs would raid our province. Sometimes they would wreck on our shore and we would have our revenge. It was one such wreck that changed my life forever and brought on this most disagreeable affair..."

Their's was a love that would span decades. It all started when HMS Aardvark wrecked on the Catalucian shore. The moment their eyes met, they knew neither would be complete without the other. Yet it was a forbidden love. El Rey, a minor member of the Dark Elf Catalucian aristocracy and Miss Catherine, darling of Londinium society and neice of one of Great Britorcn's generals.

A few weeks later a landing party from HMS Shut It arrived seeking Miss Catherine's return. Neither El Rey nor Miss Catherine would have any truck with that idea and the landing party withdrew rebuffed.

Now, El Rey knew Orcs and knew that this would not be the end of the affair. Bundling Miss Catherine and her serving Halfling, Dotti into the church, he assembled his men. His most trusted compadre, the enigmantic, Elf With No Name was detailed to guard the ladies in the church.

El Rey drew the remaining six elves of his command up in two ranks facing the road to the shore and waited.
La milicia de la ciudad de los pantalones apretados
Formed up before the church
The Capitan did not have long to wait. Six Jacke Tarr's soon appeared over the dunes, advancing with purposeful strides. They bore a mix of pistols, cutlasses and Bessies. Their leader was a Bosun's Mate toting a pistol and a belaying pin.
The Landing Party
Game Note:

This game was played solitaire using a mixture of both the up coming "Muskets and Mohawks 2" rules and the wonderful "Flintloque" rules.

The scenario idea comes from one of the "scenario seeds" in "War in Catalucia" available from Alternative Armies. In that scenario Orc Marines are raiding a Dark Elf village in search of dusky elven maidens. Well I haven't any dusky elven maiden figures and more importantly I do have the figures from the now sadly OOP Flintloque scenario boxed set "El Rey and the One Armed Bandit".

With that in mind I decided to stage a prequel to the events in that set. Long before the Amorican Elves invaded Catalucia, El Rey first meets Miss Catherine. The events depicted here lead to El Rey's deep dislike for the Orc military establishment even as he later requires their help to free his country from the Ferach.


La milicia de la ciudad de los pantalones apertados
El Ray, Rep 5, Militia, sword
Elf with No Name, Rep 5, Militia, two pistols
2x Rep 4 Militia, standard musket
4x Rep 3 Militia, standard musket

Landing party from HMS Shut It!:

Bosun's Mate, Rep 5, Marine, pistol and belaying pin
1x Rep 4 Marine, pistol and cutlass
1x Rep 4 Marine, Orc Bessie
1x Rep 3 Marine, pistol and cutlass
2x Rep 3 Marine, Orc Bessie

While classed "Marines" in Flintloque terms the landing party was composed of ship's crew rather than actual marines (cause I haven't any)!

Now back to the game...

As the Orc party approached, El Rey gave the signal to fire!

The elves' muskets roared as one belching a thick cloud of smoke.

Having seen El Rey raise his sword the more experienced members of the landing party knew what was coming and threw themselves to the ground.

Although the volley caused no casualties the noise and the smoke was too much for the landing party's three junior members and they fled for the beach. No doubt they will receive a stern talking to back on the boat but at least they have now seen the elephant.

One of the Rep 4 militiamen had mistakenly fired his ramrod with the first shot and quickly exchanged his musket for that of the elf behind him.

The remaining Bessie armed orc fired, putting down the left most front rank elf (he had aimed at the center elf)!

The Bosun's Mate and his remaining cutlass armed orc charged! Or at least they tried to. At the last minute they found the line of militia too formidable and ran back to the dune.

There then occurred a brisk fire fight twixt muskets, Bessie, and pistols.

Finally one of the orcs actually hit what he was aiming at and the remaining Rep 4 elf took a wound. This quite unnerved the Rep 3 militia men and they quickly dropped their arms, and carried the wounded elf off for medical treatment. El Rey stood alone!
One hit, four more take him to safety.

The Elf with No Name quickly rushed from the church, ladies in tow. Miss Catherine could not be restrained it seemed and insisted they rush to aid of her amor.
A lady determined.
Guns blazing the Elf with No Name engaged the sailors.
Pistols at 30 cm!
Once again the Tarr's charged. This time they stopped short of impact and both groups fired one at the other. The Elf with No Name was grievously wounded taking 1 of his 2 possible wounds.
A vicious fire fight.
 With his only companion wounded and his Lady Love at stake, El Rey charged the Bosun's Mate! El Rey feinted and then drove his point home!
First blood to El Rey!
It was a blow that would have killed any elf but not so an orc. The orc gritted his fangs and fought on.

A seafaring orc can give as good as he gets.
The two duelists remained locked in combat while the fire fight went on around them. Soon the orcis belaying pin drove home, staggering El Rey but the Capitan kept his feet.

Finally the orc scored another hit and El Rey fell senseless to the ground.

Un-elfed, No Name turned to flee and was shot in the back as he ran.

The landing party quickly gathered up the ladies and made haste for HMS Shut It.

When El Rey finally woke, he set about planning his revenge.

Well that was fun and down to the wire too. Thought it was all over when half the sailors ran at the first volley but not so.

Sadly, love does not conquer all this time!

BTW All of the figures were painted by the good folks at Alternative Armies. I re-painted El Rey's uniform to match his Elvis impersonator description in the El Rey and the One Armed Bandit scenario pack.

Hope you enjoyed the tale and thanks for stopping by!


  1. A nice fight...also a good lead in for a next possible scenario...El Rey's raid upon orcish shores to rescue his lost love...
    Once again, nice BatRep...I never thought about musket battles in a fantasy setting...nice!

  2. A great Battle report - thank you for posting.


  3. Well done and thanks for the info on the back drop.